Unleashed: The True Story of a Recovering Serial Monogamist

My Weekend at the Splay-ground

Part II (Sunday)

The frustrating and disappointing evening with JE slowly led to his demise and relegation to ‘friend’ status – if that. I am well aware that he only stayed in touch with me the year prior because of the opportunity to get in my pants (though he claims differently), so I really don’t expect to hear from him much now (which is fine with me since I actually want a connection with my partner). But after that evening, I needed a little pick-me-up and a lot of satisfaction. So last night, I went out with Israeli Daniel. I had met Daniel through some friends, and while I had not been immediately attracted to him, certain things he said with sincerity had turned the tide in his favor. That, and he was one of the few white guys I had ever met who could dance.


So we met up, had some coffee, chatted about ourselves, and ended up making out for a while (note: the man has very talented and tender lips). One of the things I am attracted to most about him is his sense of humor. I know, it’s pretty cliché, and I actually used to think that was a bunch of bunk, but clichés are based in truth and I have been wrong before. Laughing is very hot; don’t underestimate it.


Anyway, one of the things he does is tease me endlessly about being older (apparently I’m a ‘puma’), but he does so in a really cracked kind of way; then again, I’m a ‘cracked’ kind of girl so it works. I seriously can’t explain just how much I laugh when I’m around him; it feels so great. Life is difficult enough – laughing makes it seem better.


Did I mention Daniel kisses superbly? Yes, well, for the record, a man who knows what to do with his mouth and tongue gets me extremely wound up. He also has very good rhythm and knows how to move his body, especially against mine… Just the right amount of pressure, at the right time, and in the right place…


It might be an Israeli thing, but it might also be that I find Israeli men incredibly erotic. The olive skin, the cockiness, confidence, speaking another language (that I understand and fire back at them), sharing the cultural history and passion for the land and the people, hearing the hot accent… Sigh.


These are all excellent things that carry huge amounts of potential, but there was a slight problem this time around…


Daniel invited me back to his place (his place being his parents’ place – he’s only 25) but it was getting late and I didn’t really want to go back there and spend the night. Can you say AWKWARD? I don’t want to wake up and sneak out, only to get caught by his PARENTS… Not cool. Especially since his mom and my mom worked together once upon a time and still know each other (nobody ever talks about the negative side of playing Jewish geography).


I’ve snuck out of a parental house once already, unsuccessfully I might add (last summer – never again). So perhaps I would sleep with him (okay, I definitely would, and make him say really dirty things to me in Hebrew while inside me), but he really needs to get his own place first. I’d like the opportunity to be as loud as I’d like without worrying whether I’m hearing his mother or father’s footsteps out in the hallway, or whether I have forgotten my purse in the living room where it can be easily spotted. Oops.


Amalie Paris



*I can be found on Facebook, and feel free to follow my tweets, ask me questions, share your stories or comments! @AmalieParis


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