Unleashed: The True Story of a Recovering Serial Monogamist











Amalie’s Rules

You get what you demand….


A.    I am a taller woman (5’9”) and I want to feel lady-like, so I need a taller man. 6’0” and up (unless you really impress me and then you can get away with being only slightly taller than me). I want to be able to wear my heels and still be shorter than my man.


B.    I am a runner. I have completed numerous races including 5Ks, 10Ks, and a marathon. I need a man who takes care of himself physically, who knows how to eat properly and healthily, and who can keep up with me.


C.    I am a professional. A man who wants to be with me has to earn his own money and must not rely on me to bring in the proverbial bacon.


D.   For the most part, I am incredibly sweet and giving. But in general, I am intelligent, confident, sassy, and a handful. The man MUST be able to keep up with me, both verbally and physically.


E.    The interested man must never unfairly judge my friends or me. That is the quickest way to have me stop associating or talking to you.


F.    I need a man who is hot and confident, but not an asshole or a pretty boy. You can know you’re a good-looking guy; don’t let it go to your head and act like you’re G-d’s gift to the planet. There is always someone prettier, funnier, and better than you.


G.   Honesty goes a long way.


H.   I am an intelligent girl. I like having intelligent conversations. Physical attraction and performance is very important, but I can’t feel like I’m losing brain cells speaking with you.


I.      At heart, I am a traditionalist. That means, gentlemen, that you:

a.     Open doors for me and help me put my coat on;

b.     Do not swear excessively around me (unless we’re attending or watching a sports event);

c.     Pay for meals and movie tickets;

d.     Do not allow me to see the bill when you pay it (or ask me what the 20% tip should be; I can do math); and

e.     Must have decent grammar so that I am not correcting you (in my head, or aloud if you piss me off);


J.      I can change the rules whenever it suits me, but in general, the above will stick.


Note: Do not assume anything about me based on the above. I will still bend and/or break any or all the rules when necessary, and will enjoy doing so… Making assumptions will end the night. Very quickly. And not in a good way.


Amalie Paris

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